Jul 4 2015 Sensuality for the Soul Mission StatementCategory: General     06:04PM   0


Healing the Split between:

Love and Lust

Spiritual and Erotic 

Purity and Impurity

Peace and Passion 

Heart and Pelvis 

Sacred and Sexy



Your Map to Sexuality that is Soulful, Meaningful, Sexy and Hot


Take a moment and savor these pairs of words.

Notice what feelings and sensations they evoke in you.






At first glance these words seem like pairs of opposites, like enemies competing over the same territory.

The word Love is associated with compassion and respect, while Lust carries an assumption of objectification.

Spiritual speaks of transcendent realities that are beyond the body, while Erotic evokes the blood pumping intensity of the flesh.

Peace is a state of cool, contented stillness. Passion is voracious, desirous and wild.

Sacred has a tone of quiet, holy reverence while Sexy speaks of loud seduction and the wink of playful flirtation.

Authentic Tantra is ultimately a path of non-duality. It is the crazy wisdom that exists in the center of opposites. The polarities of Light and Dark, Masculine and Feminine, and Form and Formless are the core pairs of opposites the Tantrika works with.

The spiritualization of sex in the modern Neo-Tantra movement has rekindled an ancient reverence for the sacred power of our sexual energy, but in the process, many of the human aspects of Eros have been deemed “lower” or less evolved. When the primary focus of sexuality is on Love, Sacredness and Spirituality, the hotter, wilder, more instinctual sexual impulses, which are a natural source of deep satisfaction, can become watered down or repressed.

The pleasure of Spiritual Sexuality is peaceful and aware, like a cool river humming with stillness and serenity.

If we move to the other side of the polarity, and fully embrace the steamy, horny world of Eroticism, we get the exciting, hot, thrilling pleasure of Sexy and Passionate Lust. Often these states are steeped in fantasy, and there can be a reluctance to bring any Spiritual or conscious awareness into the mix for fear that it might take away the fun of our juicy erotic hunger. When the primary focus of sexuality is Lust and Passion, the compassionate, healing, reverential aspects of connection are often lost, and the intensity can be exhausting rather than nourishing or fulfilling.

The pleasure of Erotic Sexuality is intoxicating and unconscious, it burns hot and fast and often feels like an exciting dream.

There is a fundamental opposition of Light and Dark in this opposing dynamic. As with all duality, when we embrace one side, we automatically reject the other. My use of the words Light and Dark do NOT mean Good and Bad, but rather refer to a point of focus which is either more Spiritual, Subtle and Transcendent (Light) or Human, Dense and Immanent (Dark).

I see this polarity as an exciting opportunity for integration and for the birth of a third type of expression. A union of the spiritual and transcendent with the immanent and human. I would deem this third, new energy Soulful Sexuality.

Dark sexuality, which can also be called Eroticism, is deeply personal because it is made up of our unique fantasies and desires. The raw passion of lust and animal instinct of these desires often contain a Soulful Core of powerful emotion and can lead us to meaningful contact with our deepest selves. There is also a profound pleasure and satisfaction in allowing the flow of our natural, primal, human sexuality.

The trouble is that these earthy, intoxicating, hot aspects of sexuality are often wound in guilt, shame and judgment. When we hold Dark sexuality as something to be controlled or deem it inherently impure, our desires become neurotic and fearful, the antithesis of pleasure and nourishment. Eroticism can also leave us feeling drained and exhausted, rather than fulfilled and uplifted. This happens when we continuously grasp at more and more desire, becoming attached to a particular erotic moment, forgetting to savor the inherent pleasure of the present moment.

The Dark aspect of our sexuality is beautiful and natural, yet its waters can be chaotic and we can easily wind up lost or left with a feeling of emptiness.

Light sexuality has attempted to spiritualize sexuality by repressing and denying its Darker aspects. The result is a peaceful, heart-centered, yet watered down experience of sexuality, often disembodied with puritanical notions of what is worthy of being deemed sacred.

When Dark Sexuality is no longer repressed, and the Light qualities of compassion, peace and awareness are brought in, we have the birth of a third sexuality.

Sexuality that is Soulful, Meaningful, Sexy and Hot.

When the ground of a sexual experience is Presence, the deep dark waters of Eroticism can be navigated more skillfully.

When the experience of the Heart is attended to as much as the sensations of the Pelvis, our pleasure becomes deeper and more fulfilling.

When Lust is met with Love and Compassion, it becomes a source of connection rather than separation.    

When our Passion is allowed to exist alongside a deep abiding Peace, we can be satisfied by our hunger rather than continuously grasping for more.

When the arousal of a Sexy seduction is revered as totally Sacred, we are free surrender into the ecstasy of longing.

Working with the energies of Light and Dark sexuality is dynamic, intuitive and alchemical. When one aspect is prominent, the other aspect can be brought in to add balance.

Another way to go about this practice is to Ascend into the Light of the Spiritual Transcendent, and then Descend back into the Density of the Body. This repeated Ascending and Descending is a Tantric weaving of duality into the Bliss of Non-Duality. The dance of these opposites as they merge into union creates an intensely rich, healing, nourishing, exciting, erotic experience of full spectrum sexuality.









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